The Light Entertainment at the End of the Tunnel. Ridin' that train... yes, that train...

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Those Fed Rat-Bastards!

"Fed Ponders Provides $85 Billion Rescue for AIG (Update: Now Official)"

I had no idea Hank was so heartless!
Dear Earl, We would like to help out, we really would, but we're just not geared up to write a check for $000,000,005,000 Billion. We'd have to retool, and it would be an accounting nightmare. Also, America wasn't made the great nation it was by people thinking small. Face it, Earl, a few hundred people asking for a payout that none of us here can even count down to amount to nothing more than collateral damage. If you can arrange to overthrow an elected government somewhere, and kill at least a thousand or so bystanders in the process, get back to us. Otherwise, you need to quit whining and take one for the team like a good lemming American. And another thing: when was the last time Santa Cruz elected a Republican? Face it, Earl, there are probably more registered Greens there than Republicans. Maybe you should ask the Japanese instead. It's been a tough week, and I have an early tee time tomorrow, so I've gotta run. But we're here to help, so drop us a line any time and best of luck. Hank

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